Ah, hello. Come on in. You just get those pesky trousers off and let me tell you what I do here.

Despite being one of the world’s most indolent layabouts, I’ve managed to write seven books. Seven!

But you might know me as the voice of New Escapologist or from my column in the Idler.

Mainly, I write miscellaneous short pieces as any humorist should. 800 words and then home.

There’s a mailing list you can join for the occasional newsletter. It’s the winning alternative to social media.

Why not have a poke around my website? I hope you like it. Just wipe your feet, were you born in a barn? Oh, you were? I beg your pardon.


Current Doings

It finally happened. My first novel just dropped. Splish-splash.

And after a successful Kickstarter, New Escapologist Issue 14 is available now.

As if that weren’t enough, Go Faster Stripe just published Melt It! The Book of the Iceman. It has a foreword by Simon Munnery and an afterword by Stewart Lee. I’m very proud of this one so get it while it’s cold.

For more current doings, see my now page.


What the sages said

“Delightful and insightful” — Ben Moor

“Brilliant” — Mark Watson

“Superb” — Dominic Cavendish, Telegraph

“Excellent, brilliant, essential” — Stewart Lee

“Devilishly clever” — Arnold Brown

“The best prose writer I know” — Luke Rhinehart

“A literary gem.” — Handelsblatt

“Side-splitting” — British Comedy Guide