Too Far

Samara’s mum reads Internet funnies to us as we watch the hockey.

“You got the dough,” she says, “We got the ho.” It’s the sign on a whorehouse door.

Well, I can do better than that, I think.

“You got the scratch,” I say brightly, “We got the snatch.”

I worry I’ve gone too far, but I’m disappointed by the positive and unscandalised reaction.

So here’s another one in case she’s reading:

You bring the green, we’ll bring the pink.

Doesn’t even have to rhyme. The secret is being vile.

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