Poking around in the University gift shop with Alan today, he hands me a leather key fob and asks that I decipher the embossed text on the back of it. “Is it a name?” he asks.
I squint at it and read it aloud:
GENUINE HIDE LEATHER, it says, MADE IN SCOTLAND.
“That’s what it says on your arse isn’t it?” I say.
Well, one of us had to. It was hanging there in space. Like Alan’s arse.