Diary

Alan’s Arse

15 August 2019 | Diary

Poking around in the University gift shop with Alan today, he hands me a leather key fob and asks that I decipher the embossed text on the back of it. “Is it a name?” he asks.

I squint at it and read it aloud:

GENUINE HIDE LEATHER, it says, MADE IN SCOTLAND.

“That’s what it says on your arse isn’t it?” I say.

Well, one of us had to. It was hanging there in space. Like Alan’s arse.



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