Diary

Pandemonium

08 July 2019 | Diary

I’d gone out without a bag as usual, so as I walked home from the shops, I found myself juggling some vegetables and two “fishless fishcakes.” I was already dreading the conversation if I bumped into someone I knew. Why do I do it to myself? Coming through the park and rounding a corner, I […]

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Temerity

| Diary

On the back cover of Werner Herzog’s Of Walking in Ice, there’s a blurb from a current popular author: Surely the strangest, strongest walking book I know … only Herzog could have written this weird, slender classic. — Popular Author Imagine the cheek you’d need to have to write something like that of Werner Herzog. […]

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Obliterated by Nuns

07 July 2019 | Diary

A jaunt by train to see Greek Thomson’s Holmwood House. It turns out to be undergoing major restoration work and it’s not quite what one would describe as “open,” but the volunteers on site let us in for a look around anyway. Disappointingly, nobody uses the expression, “caught with our pants down.” We cannot see […]

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Ducks

06 July 2019 | Diary

The new Idler hits the doormat. As well as my regular column this time, I have a feature about the FIRE movement (early retirement and whatnot with special reference to my old friends Jacob and Pete). Art director Alice has decorated my piece with images of an exquisite young Greek reclined upon a velveteen olive-green […]

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Underbite

05 July 2019 | Diary

Coming in from work, Samara mentions seeing a minor altercation on the train. Apparently it involved “a woman with a scrunchie and an underbite.”

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Mr Apollo

| Diary

On my way to the cinema this afternoon, I find that I’m almost an hour early so I pop into a cafe with the intention of doing some light editing work from my phone. Just as I’m sitting down, I see that the person at the next table is Penny. I don’t know Penny super-well […]

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Private Garden™

04 July 2019 | Diary

On one of my regular walks, past a row of nice old houses, I pass a sign that reads, in red text, “PRIVATE GARDEN: FOR RESIDENTS ONLY.” The “garden” in question is not much more than a strip of lawn, shielded slightly from the main public pavement by a hedge. It’s a mere spit–a gossling–of […]

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Kraffts

03 July 2019 | Diary

Meet Katia and Maurice Krafft, husband and wife volcanologists. I chanced upon their incredible footage today while watching Into the Inferno, part of a Herzog bender I seem to be on. Have a look: To be the Tommy and Tuppence of volcanology, eh? Not bad. Hand in hand, on the edge of the sand…

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Monster, Fun-Bucket Chaos

| Diary

Neil‘s overhaul (4.1?) of my website is DONE. Overhauled, overnight. Fabulous! There was some chat about running with this header image and a smaller, neater version of the same. “I prefer the energy and the monster, fun-bucket chaos of the larger one,” I said. Neil: FUN BUCKET CHAOS ALL THE WAY! No bad credo for […]

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Hamburger Menu

02 July 2019 | Diary

To Super Bario, Glasgow’s retro-gaming pub, for a meeting with Neil about this very website. The site needs a minor upgrade, not least to make it look less dog’s-dinnerish when viewed on a mobile phone. I learn during this meeting that the little expandable menu often seen on mobile websites is called a “hamburger menu.” […]

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